Hello, My Name is Joe Conga

Version:2.0

Author: David Saxton Ullery

Hello, my name is Joe Conga, and this is my story!

Hello, my name is Joe Conga, and this is my story!

I am a man with a plan to rule the world.

I am a man with a plan to rule the world with my amazing ability to dazzle the dames.

Tee Hee!  Hello, my name is Dotee Lotee. Joe has most certainly dazzled me!

Tee Hee! Hello, my name is Dotee Lotee. Joe has most certainly dazzled me!

…  That’s one down, 3,287,231 dames to go!

I live inside the head of Trevor Lick, but I swear to you that I am just as real as he is!

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Emergence II

By David Saxton Ullery

Performed By: David Saxton Ullery on Roland JV-30 Synthesizer

for: Upgrade 01A, Child’s Toy

08:22 (headphones recommended)

(click below if the above link fails)

<◊→Emergence II ←◊>

Emergence II

Emergence TRK 3→

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John and Jerry Part I – The Continuing Story of Dr. Chasey Lick

Author: David S. Ullery

May 4, 2007

Note:  Modified on 7/29/2008

Part II to become available soon!

Just barely after John awakened from his new upgrade installation, he mentalmarked to Jerry:

But, try to never overly split infinitives, never say “never” too many times in one sentence, never write lengthy, overly descriptive “run on sentences” (one should avoid the over use of parenthesis, lengthy quotations, and italicized words nested within; such as the infamous sentence: “John, while Jerry had had ‘had’, had had ‘had had’; ‘had had’ had had a better affect on the teacher.” – avoid dashes and confusing the meanings of words like affect and effect, and speling errors); never begin a sentence with “But”, never write self-referencing sentences (this sentence speaks for itself), and last but not least, avoid clichés, redundancies, repeating oneself, and never end a sentence with “and”.

Jerry replied verbally, “Oh, Okay. Thanks for the tip, I will keep that in mind. I think you need more rest!”

John fell back to sleep and would sleep for another 10 hours. While drifting off, his head was full of many strange ideas that were oddly self-referential and whimsical. Where or when had he heard (or seen – he must have seen it – so very very odd!) that strange brain script before?

Jerry closed his eyes, thought for a moment about his friend’s half-conscious, grammatically-odd musings and began laughing to himself. “This sentence has no content other than eight words.” briefly appeared in his mind’s eye, and he laughed and wondered “which eight?” Jerry had had the same upgrade last Tuesday. He suddenly felt hungry for eye of newt, because that is what the witch ate.

Jerry figured that his aberrant thoughts, bizzare appetite, and sudden quaint paranomasia propensity all indicated that his upgrade needed some adjusting, so he pinged Dr. Lick over the web (of course). Dr. Lick’s avatar assistent told Jerry not to worry, she knew what to do (of course), and asked Jerry to lie down on the vacant bed just next to John’s.

Dr. Lick’s avatar left a short mentalmark for the good doctor to notice after it would reach the front of her priority queue:

The patients John and Jerry are both sound asleep. Jerry had had a premature unstable communication linkup with his colleague John right after John had awoken! Recommend adjustments to the upgrade instructions to avoid this side effect on future patients. Please proceed with the minor adjustments to the BrocaScript upgrade unit as soon as possible.

Dr. Chasey Lick had just turned 17 last week and had only began practicing medicine for one and a half years, but she knew that she only had a few hours to act, otherwise both patients would have about a 30% likelihood of suffering from expressive aphasia-like symptoms that would be both difficult and very expensive to repair. Chasey’s reputation was on the line! She was swiftly becoming well regarded in the new BrocaScript specialty, and she could not afford any setbacks. Many of Chasey’s colloquies had expressed concern over her young age, both in front of and behind her back.

Without hesitation, and with great skill, Dr. Lick  swiftly located, modified and downloaded the script that both John and Jerry’s nano-implants would need to adjust and repair their identically-flawed upgrades. John and Jerry would both surely recover after completing their lengthy sleep. Chasey made sure to include a mental note in the script to remind the two patients not to attempt any mentalmarking for at least 8 hours after awakening!

Chasey could relax now, at least for a bit, and get back to her hobby of ancestral searching. She was delighted and amazed with a recent discovery of what appeared to be a quaint old technology known as a slideshow that showed old photographs depicting what was once called a mini-vacation that her great-great-grand-parents must have taken so very long ago. The young doctor leaned back in her flexchair, closed her eyes, propped her feet up on her beautiful oldish Aerogel coffee table.  Chasey slowly took in a deep relaxing breath of high-oxygenated filtered air, further enhancing her newly acquired meditative state, then viewed the old slideshow.

Although the conscious part of Chasey was virtually completely relaxed, a remote part of her subconscious mind was busily processing, puzzling over, and concerned over the concept of, and the possibility of the spread of a potentially new type of meme virus

Chasey’s mind wandered some more, as she started thinking about her poor father, Trevor and his odd story. She laughed nervously, then began to cry once again, as she often did whenever she thought of her daddy.

too be continued …

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Upgrade01A???…Return to those thoughts…

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